February 29th, 2008 Brunette
When I first started this blog it was a means to unclutter my mind with all the crap that was in there; irritations about my separation and husband, to help with a bit of child-stress, and to maybe figure out where I needed to go in life. My venting machine - hmm… change the title? Nah!
No one knew in my family that I was writing this blog, no need to share it with them. Again, my venting blog. What good was a venting blog if I shared it with those I vented about? So, no one knew, and still to today, no one in my family knows about this particular blog.
As I ventured out and began blogging other places, I had to schedule my time a bit more wisely. I never take time from my children, but I did begin to ask their dad to keep them an hour longer for his time. When time changed, the questions followed. What’s going on? So, I told him.
Well, the thing I knew would happen, happened. “What? That’s stupid! Why are you doing that?” “Takes time away from the family.” No, you mean it takes time away from you! You want me to be doing what you want; going here, going there, doing this, doing that. The questions never ended.
By the time he was done, I felt like calling it quits. Again, one more thing that I do for me, squashed by the attitude of a selfish man. I didn’t quit, I enjoy what I do. Even if only one person reads each of the blogs I do, I do them for me and to either give enjoyment, help or advice.
Well, he knows I blog, but not what they are; he could care less. I told him because we are suppose to be mending our relationship, this is important to me, so I thought I would share something I felt for, but this is one more reason to question “What the heck am I still doing with him?”
Posted in Marriage, The Bitch Session | 15 Comments »
February 18th, 2008 Brunette
Runny nose, stuffy nose, coughing, groggy eyes, horse throat, and of course the inevitable “Mommy hold me.” Oh yea, sick kid in the house. Miss K sounds terrible, looks bad, and I can just feel me getting sick right along with her. My poor baby.
Nothing is worse then a sick little one at home. Although Miss K is 7, she is still full throttle baby when she is sick. Wanting to be held, wanting me to lay down with her, watching another cartoon; you name, she will ask for it. The one good thing about her though, she doesn’t mind the doctor and she doesn’t mind medicine.
Yea - I said medicine. I did give my 7 year old cold medicine. I know the whole “immune” thing going on lately with cold medicine, kids and emergency rooms, but when my child is miserable, I am going to give her something to help. Don’t tell my MIL, she will freak!
Feeling a little better, able to breathe out one side of her nose, she is now walking around dragging the big pink, stuffed puppy from Valentine’s Day and carrying her tissue box. Even when sick, she can look like a cutie 
Oops… Lulabell is tagging along on the tail of the pup. Funny!
Always a strong appetite for such a tiny girl, she could eat me out of house and home. I feel many times I need to devote just one paycheck to her food alone. Her appetite is still with her even sick. That is something about her, she can eat - regardless. I think we just finished snack # 4 and she is starting to settle down.
Is that quiet I hear? *sigh of relief* Finally, ready to get some rest - she is, not me. I still have laundry, and dishes… all the fun stuff to do. Crap… homework too!
Posted in Life's Little Adventures | 4 Comments »
February 11th, 2008 Brunette
I admit that I am not too keen on living in Arkansas. I don’t hate it, I’m not miserable, but I can’t say this is where I want to spend the rest of my life either. Do I want to move? Not yet. I am in an OK place mentally and work-wise, and with my kids happy where they are, why is he pushing it?
Every year around the same time the spouse begins his “Let’s move” initiative. Need I remind you that we are in Arkansas because he needed to move back by his mom? I didn’t choose to move here, but since day one it seems like he is constantly wanting to go. Well, I told him to go if he wants. I am not keeping him here. With all of the past year and a half rolled up, I would not think any less of him if he did move.
“Do what’s right for you,” is what spilled from my mouth.
“I want you and the kids to come with me.”
Basically, that was the conversation all weekend long. He needs to understand that our sepearation has helped me realize that our children come first, not him. Moving is what he wants, again for selfish reasons that have nothing to do with family. I was done with that a year and a half ago, why on earth would I bring that back into my life?
Just another one of those complaints that leave me asking myself when he will get the point? We separated - it’s not about him anymore.
Posted in Marriage, The Bitch Session | 2 Comments »
